Scale Rage

Seriously.......I haven't wanted to post this week because I am so stinkin' mad at myself at the scale that I've pretty much just moped all week.  I have "maintained" my weightloss going on about 4 months - I don't really consider the 12 pounds I've lost this YEAR as being in weightloss mode because it has happened so sssssslowwww.  Can you tell that I've had a couple of rough ones?  I had a major binge over this past weekend and I figured I'd have recovered from it scalewise by Wednesday - I honestly weigh a bit more on Monday's and Tuesday's because my eating is so reckless different on the weekends.  However, this week has been a big ole fat exception to my self-imposed rule - I was weighing in at 240 up until Thursday when it dropped down to 238 and I was sitting at 237.6 this morning.  I have been eating so well - better than I have in a couple of weeks, so you can see the reason for my concern.  I seriously wanted to hang up the old tennis shoes, skip the gym, and blame everything and everyone today.  Instead, I got the twins ready for school - the fighting, complaining and yelling always add to the ambiance, which they have been doing for like 3 weeks - packed Livvy and the girls in the ped and was on my way.  After I dropped the twins off at school I decided to call my sweetie-pie-of-a-sister Ashley (no, I haven't signed Oprah's no phone zone, I know, I know, stupid.stupid.stupid) because I desperately needed to talk this out - it has put me in a serious funk.  And once I started talking about my week she gently reminded me that sometimes your body retains water (we've decided that's what has happened to me), etc. regardless of how well you are eating and exercising.  I realized that I haven't been getting near enough sleep this week and I am s.t.r.e.s.s.e.d - the twins have been in their fun fighting funk, Livvy is acting different and we are coming up on the final countdown for our family vacation to Disneyland.  It also doesn't help that I have been hopping on the scale AT LEAST 6 times per day - you know, to check and see if it has reset itself and is now weighing me correctly.  So, I've decided to do this: I put my scale away for one week - whatever I weigh next Friday is what I weigh.  It will not affect my vacation or any of my family members vacation.  When I get back from said vacation I will be revisiting my goals and finding ways to calm down refocus so that I can go back into true weightloss mode.  Side note:  Just because the scale is put away does not mean I am going to go all willy-nilly (does anyone say that anymore?) with my eating.  I will continue to eat the way have this past week and end the week out strong with my strength training/cardio before the VanDyke clan hits Disneyland (I am seriously so excited!)

this is me now.